Coming Home Day - Rescheduled for October

Have you ever experienced something where you think you're ready to talk about it, and then as soon as you have to call your best friend, you break down/cry/just can't do it?

Best friend, forgive me - because you're probably going to read this before I can bring myself to call you. My heart hurts, and I'm just not ready yet. But I need to get this out somewhere, so here it goes.

I've tried my hardest to be brave over the last 367 days while Christopher was away.  I say away, because it's almost like he could be at college.  Until I let myself remember that he's deployed, in Korea, and there are people shooting at him. ::tears::

When Chris left, July 5, 2010 it was supposed to be a 1 year deployment, with a 2 week leave in the middle to come home at Christmas.  I could make it to Christmas, that was only 6 months! Except, his leave request got denied at Christmas, so he couldn't come home.  And then my grandmother passed away, and he couldn't get home on such short notice. And then it was almost July 7th, the day he was supposed to come home and join my family for a week-long vacation.

Cue sometime in May, I forget when - we found out Chris was going to be stationed at Fort Campbell, which happens to be in Kentucky, the middle of freaking nowhere. So, in his attempt to get placed at a different base (preferably Ft. Drumm, NY), Christopher's Colonel helped him make the best decision for himself.  I respect that he needs to make these decisions for himself, but that doesn't make it much easier to hear when you're stateside, and he's thousands of miles away.

Christmas 2009 - the 4 most important people in my life

The good news is - Chris was promoted to specialist, and got a medal.  Yay Boy Wonder! The bad news is, Christopher won't be home for another 90 days.  Now I know 90 days isn't forever, and in the scheme of a year, what's another 90 days? But right now, when he was supposed to come home today, 90 days is endless.  I miss my little brother, and all I want is a hug. So I'll bake my heart out for the next 90 days, put my eating out budget money into the US Postal Service, and try to remind him how much we love him. But boy, do I need a hug.